Look Back In Anger

We had a New Year's party, complete with booze, ham, fireworks and the first-ever West Coast Ballot Box for A.H.O.Y., the annual Asshole Of The Year Poll. In the hope that they will inspire even one person to click over and vote, here are the ballots we collected. Special thanks the hardworking Ann Thrope, who tabulated votes on-site--with a paper trail--and declared that Tom DeLay won the night. Congratulations, Congressman! Voting closes January 8th.

Anonymous lists:
1. George W. Bush
2. Dick Cheney
3. Tom DeLay
4. Paris Hilton
5. Donald Rumsfeld
6. Barbara Bush
7. Bill O'Reilly
8. Tom Cruise
9. Rush Limbaugh
10. Saddam Hussein

Bob lists:
1. George Bush
2. Paris Hilton
3. Rush Limbaugh
4. Bill O'Reilly
5. Michael Bolton
6. Dick Cheney
7. Tom Cruise
8. Don Imus
9. Pope Benedict XVI
10. Parents Of Terri Schiavo

Anonymous lists:
1. Brownie
2. Tom DeLay
3. Tom Cruise
4. Judith Miller
5. Nancy Pelosi
6. Bill Cosby
7. Chris Matthews
8. Ted Stevens
9. Anderson Cooper
10. Randy "Duke" Cunningham

Erin lists:
1. George Bush

Anonymous lists:
1. Ann Coulter
2. George Bush
3. Barbara Bush
4. Dick Cheney
5. Tom Delay

Anonymous lists:
1. George W. Bush
2. Dick Cheney
3. Barbara Bush (eldest)
4. Alberto Gonzales
5. Tom DeLay
6. Bill Frist
7. Hillary Clinton
8. Karl Rove
9. Joseph Alito
10. Joe Lieberman

Anonymous lists:
1. George W. Bush
2. Dick Cheney
3. Brownie
4. Michael Chertoff
5. Karl Rove
6. Scooter Libby
7. Sean Hannity
8. Bill O'Reilly
9. Scott McClellan
10. Curt Schilling

Anonymous lists:
1. Dick Cheney
2. W.
3. Ann Coulter
4. Jessica Simpson
5. Ashlee Simpson
6. Bill O'Reilly
7. Judith Miller
8. Bob Novak
9. Tom DeLay
10. Bill Frist

Anonymous lists:
1. Bill O'Reilly
2. Rick Santorum
3. Donald Rumsfeld
4. Scott McClellan
5. Matt Drudge
6. Kansas, the whole damned state
7. Sean Hannity
8. Tom Coburn
9. Ann Coulter
10. Dick Cheney

Eliz. lists:
1. Jean Schmidt
2. Arnold Schwarzenegger
3. Ann Coulter
4. Michael Brown
5. Tom DeLay
6. Kobe Bryant
7. Terell Owens
8. Rick Santorum
9. Sean Hannity
10. Bill O'Reilly

Anonymous lists:
1. George Bush
2. Rick Santorum
3. Donald Rumsfeld
4. Tom Ccruise
5. Tom DeLay
6. Pat Robertson
7. Jan Croch (sp?)
8. Paris Hilton
9. Maury Povich
10. Brownie

Crusher lists:
1. Tyne Daly
2. Karl Karcher
3. Tim Meadows
4. Ed Asner
5. Tim O'Neil
6. Fred Rogers
7. Tim Curry
8. Eric C.
9. Tom Peyer
10. Tom Arnold

Destry lists:
1. Enumclaw, WA Horse Abuser
2. L. Ron Hubbard
3. Dr. Phil
4. Tom Cruise
5. Michael Jackson
6. Woody Allen
7. Simon Cowell
8. Rick Santorum
9. Mary Kay LaTourneau (Fualau)
10. Dino Rossi

Another New Year's honor that mustn't go unmentioned: The Bar Man completed his epic quest to drink in 1000 Bars in 2005. Hip hip hooray, heroic Bar Man! We may ne'er see your like again!

Also: I was doing this month-by-month 2005 In Review, but by the time I recapped May it suddenly turned into horrible drudgery. So forget 2005, OK? The past is for losers! On to Oh-Six! (But vote in A.H.O.Y.!)

People In The News

(REUTERS, Jan. 2) Singer Liza Minnelli reacts after a coal mine explosion that may have been sparked by lightning trapped 13 miners 260 feet below ground Monday.

Baseball with over 19,100 coats of paint, via Slog!

Happy New Year, and don't forget to vote in the A.H.O.Y.!

THE NEWS EXPLAINED WITH COMIC BOOK COVERS

Canada's Supreme Court OKs Group Sex Clubs

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Poll: Only 28% Say Journalists Are 'Ethical'

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Older Women Set Sights On Young Hunks

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Jessica Simpson Says Lachey's Infidelity Caused Divorce

George W. Bush, John McCain, John Kerry and Hillary Clinton have new allies in their opposition to gay marriage!

Torture Is So 2005

Chicago Tribune: Pentagon Stalls on Banning Contractors From Using Forced Labor! [Via MetaFilter]

The gist: lobbyists are blocking a zero tolerance policy on slavery because the Halliburtons and DynCorps don't think they should be held responsible for the behavior of their subcontractors.

Which is just as well, according to some human-trafficking experts who say the policy as written would help violators escape punishment.

Today's Yankee Doodle American Eagle Rootin' Tootin' Word Of The Day:

Slavery.

2005 In Review: April-May

Star Wars Is Satan's Tool • The Marvel Team-Up I Never Wanted To See • Deeply dark, vulgar, sinister and ugly cinematic cyanide: Fundamentalist Reviews Frank Miller's Sin City • Price Is Right Links • "Simon allowed Seacrest to undress him, enjoying the intensity on the man's face as he looked over every inch of his body..." American Idol Slash Fiction • Liberals & Terrorists Team Up To Fight The Super-Hero American Patriot • Gallery Of Vandalized Britney Posters • Human Corpses Built From Poultry Meat And Posed In Wrecked Cars • The Race Is Over Checkered Flag Casket ($2495.00) • Support Our Ribbons' Ribbon Maker • Ricky Then And Now • List Of Batman Special Guest Villains Who Are Still Alive!

Insane 1940s ad for War Bonds: Suppose An Enemy Had Landed On Plymouth Rock... @ Lady, That's My Skull!

Dark Like Phoenix

Captain Jackson, a 'real life super-hero' from Jackson, Mich., was sentenced last week to six months' probation after a drunk driving arrest.

Story

His site

Biz Mag: 'Impeach Bush!'

The members of the House Judiciary Committee who staged the impeachment of President Clinton ought to be as outraged at this situation. They ought to investigate it, consider it carefully and report either a bill that would change the wiretap laws to suit the president or a bill of impeachment.

The Barron's editorial