Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Merchant Of The Week

In the pressure cooker of a detention facility, a small problem with a product can have dire and immediate consequences.

At Bob Barker we never forget that fact.
How can a small, 200-employee outfit like the Bob Barker Company call itself "The World's Leading Detention Supplier?" Maybe it's because they come prepared:
We smash radios on the floor and grind toothbrushes on cinderblock walls to see how easily they can be made into shanks.
Or maybe it's their belief that children are the future.

Or their plain-spoken way of doin' business:
For the best quality, performance, and delivery, insist on Bob Barker's Isolation/Suicide Cell products. Call us today.
Or their attention to the little things.

Or maybe they just sell the best dog-gone merchandise:

Bob Barker® TranZport Hood

Bob Barker® Ten-Man Transport Chain

At Ease® Adult Disposable Briefs

Bob Barker® Activewear

If you're ever in Fuquay-Verina, NC, stop by their new corporate headquarters and say hi! They'll be happy to reminisce about BBCs growth from "the back of a barbershop in 1972" to its latest sale of "suicide prevention products to the U.S.-managed Abu Ghraib prison in Iraq!"

Via Metafilter


STFU said...


You sound just a shade too enthusiastic about the disposable briefs.

BTW, the word verification code on thi s post is "gebzef," which I think is some kind of code in itself.

el duque said...


Everybody knows that with Bob Barker, it's truth... or consequences.

Loganite said...

Not even one "The Price is Right" reference or pun? I'm disappointed.

-- L.

Superfrankenstein said...

You don't want to see these Barker's Beauties.

Goody said...

I guess he's sick of 'reminding' people to get their pets spayed or neutered. This time he means business.

Anonymous said...

wow you folks are strange. You know nothing of the business and yet you are experts. Once again this tells me why idiots should not have computers.