Wednesday, January 04, 2006

'Unbelievable!'

geraldo_rivera_GiI happened to be recording Fox News last night--don't ask--and accidentally caught this rock of pure, uncut Geraldo. I know, every news outlet got the mining disaster wrong, but it's fun to read along as a pioneer of modern journo-porn decides to believe with all his heart something unproven. The CAPS are because he's SHOUTING.

Donna Fiducia: This is a Fox News Alert. I'm Donna Fiducia in New York. We're gonna go right to the Sago Mine in West Virgina, where Geraldo Rivera is joining us live on the phone with the latest. Geraldo, what do you have?

Geraldo: OH! THERE IS INCREDIBLE JOY THROUGHOUT THIS COMMUNITY! THEY'RE ALL SAYING THE SAME THING! THAT EVERYONE (unintelligible) HAVE BEEN FOUND ALIVE! THE MINERS ARE ALIVE! THIS IS THE MOST AMAZING THING! WE GOT HERE AND ALL WE SAW WERE JOYOUS FACES! EVERYONE IS SAYING THAT THEY HAVE FOUND THE MINERS ALIVE! IT IS UNBELIEVABLE! IT IS UNBELIEVABLE!

Fiducia: Geraldo, who told you this? Did you hear this from family members --

Geraldo: EVERYONE! EVERYONE! ALL OF THE MINERS' FAMILIES! EVERYONE! THERE IS JOY SPREADING THROUGHOUT THE PLACE! THERE'S (unintelligible) HEAR IT IN THE BACKGROUND, DONNA! THIS IS REAL! THEY ARE TELLING THE FAMILIES THAT ALL 12 OF THE OTHER MINERS HAVE BEEN FOUND ALIVE! IT IS UNBELIEVABLE!

Fiducia: Truly a New Year's miracle, definitely, Geraldo. This is something we didn't even expect--

Geraldo: IT IS AN UNBELIEVABLE MIRACLE! THIS IS UNBELIEVABLE! I MEAN, IT IS UNBELIEVABLE!
I love it when Fiducia asks Geraldo for his source, and he says "EVERYONE!"

3 comments:

rev. billy bob gisher ©2005 said...

a bora bora, the damn fool almost got his head blown off. me and the divine miss m, would have just been crushed.

send him back again. yo!

el duque said...

Superfrankenstein,

C'mon. For once, give the guy credit. Geraldo was hustling to be first to break the rumor.

Anonymous said...

I happen to know firsthand from being there at the Sago Church that Geraldo got punched out after that and landed in the mud. I wonder if you can get a hold of that footage from him camera man...