Radio Sterno: My mentor Roger Stern will be interviewed tonight at 11:30 Eastern on WUSB-FM! Click over, listen and learn all about Roger's new Superman novel!

[DISCLAIMER: I call Sterno my mentor because he taught me how to write and bought me my first pair of shoes! But that doesn't mean it's fair to blame him for the things I've done since! So leave him alone, see?]

Super F*ckers

Pete Goodrich sends news of Liberality For All, which its publisher calls "the most politically divisive comic book ever written!" It'll have to work hard to beat the time Green Lantern and Green Arrow battled the guy who looked like Vice-President Agnew, but let's see what they got:

It is 2021, tomorrow is the 20th anniversary of 9/11. America is under oppression by ultra-liberal extremists that have surrendered governing authority to the United Nations. It is up to an underground group of bio-mechanically enhanced conservatives led by Sean Hannity, G. Gordon Liddy and Oliver North to thwart Ambassador Usama Bin Laden's plans to nuke New York City.

The super-Sean Hannity's code name should be 'Hann-Thing!'

Synopsis
Preview

The Aristocrats

Comedy from Latter-day Saint Filmmakers:

The Home Teachers: Michael Birkeland (who starred as main character Will Swenson's best buddy in "The Singles Ward") plays a good-hearted but less than zealous home teacher. His new companion (played by comedian Jeff Birk, last seen in the concert film "It's Latter Day Night!") is determined that they will get all of their home teaching done. But it's the last day of the month, and seeing their families will entail a road trip fraught with more pratfalls, mishaps, and mayhem than any Elder's Quorum lesson ever prepared them for.

In the Service of God: In "In the Service of God" we find a young man named Peter about to propose to his girlfriend Molly. But before doing so he learns that Molly would never agree to marry a man who didn't do his home teaching. It's the last day of the month, and Peter has not done his home teaching, and he scrambles to visit his families (after finding out who they are) before popping the question to Molly.

Goin' Coconuts starring Donny & Marie Osmond!

PLUS: A movie called Funky Town with, apparently, an all-white cast, and Cheers: The Complete First Season!

Links Of Fury

Black Jack #1: Neilalien displays a comic he made when he was nine--and the Spider-Man panels that inspired it! [Via Clea]

Chelnica or Benteen? The Utah Baby Namer!

Myra Amos becomes Tori: Music Stars' Real Names!

"They Rock!!!!" [Via Bobbyblogs]

Christian Exodus wants to move all fundamentalists to South Carolina, then secede! Seeya!

Photos of Kevin Spacey as Lex Luthor!

Christ, That Dog's Big!

Christian Archie Comics of the '70s!

Flash Man!

Flash costume minus mask plus cape equals an all-new hero for a Boston TV ad!

[Link requires registration. Try this one. E-mail: projo@dodgeit.com Password: bugmenot]

I know I've mentioned this series before, but Jesus! Show me a better one!

A dozen dailies dropped or deturded today's Doonesbury, and they say they'll do the same tomorrow.

Lede

SAGINAW - A man accused of beating his girlfriend on Halloween with a Bible has been sentenced to 7 years and 11 months to 15 years in prison.

Man gets 7 to 15 years for assault with Bible
Lansing State Journal

Turn On, Tune In, Skip Out

A mysterious e-mail brings word of a jam-packed new website devoted to the life and works of Skip Williamson, underground cartoonist, painter, designer, writer, iconoclast, libertine, and ghaaad knows what else! Comix, cartoons, paintings, sketches, 3-D stuff, photos and film clips battle for attention with absorbing excerpts from My Bitter Agenda, his name-naming autobiography in progress!

'Chekov Will Be Next'

Photo

Posters on a Star Trek forum process Scotty's death:

What could get worse on this show? They cancel the original after three seasons, they wait almost 20 years until TNG, Enterprise is cancelled, now Scotty.

Rick Berman should be happy today it's one less of the original cast he needs to think about.

I guess his engines just couldn't take anymore. (sorry couldn't resist.)

He only had nice things to say about everybody (except Bill Shatner) and was a gentleman when I got his autograph.

Jimmy Doohan was always willing to sign autographs, and he'd sign all day for you if you gave him a bottle of good Scotch Whiskey, which of course we used to do when I worked the conventions.

He what????????? He fathered a child on the age of 79???
yikes.

Yeah, It look's like Scotty got Beamed Up this time around! He was my second favorite character in the series.

I will be watching my Original Series DVDs later like I usually do, and this time, I will in honour of James Doohan's passing.

tonight I will watch T.O.S Series 2 in rememberance.

I urge all of you to watch a Star Trek show or movie today or soon in honor of one of the best actors of all time.

I just remembered that I have a signed refrigerator magnet showing him in an easy chair, talking about transwarp drive!

If only we had a transporter beam to suspend you in time, like you had in that Next Generation episode.

Thank you for being there for Kirk when Spock died. Similarly, thank you for your support after David was murdered by the Klingons.

I always had the feeling that Scotty would be the next one to "beam up" after Dr. McCoy. I now get the uneasy feeling that Chekov will be the next.

The News

Teen gets four years in prison for comic book theft

Fantastic Four star 'hates comics'

Mathematics proves Christ was resurrected by God

Syracuse bank robber escapes by taxi to Rochester

'Scotty's' New York Times Obit

Seattle man dies after sex with horse

Washington lawmaker wants to outlaw bestiality

Comic-book loving church pastors work superheroes into sermons

Constantine's tampon! Thanks, Don Reisig!

Jim Aparo, 1932-2005

We Have Already Seen...

The always stunning comics site Dial B For Blog scans the 1966 TV Guide Article On Batman! And while we're at it, let's not forget Batfriend, the best-looking Batman '66 fansite of all--or the poor, deluded Siamese Human Knot Site!

House Of Me

Don't forget to clean out the car before you drive to the comics shop tomorrow; you'll need room for all those copies of SPIDER-MAN: HOUSE OF M #2! "I sure want it," I hear you thinking, "but is it really any good?" Fair question, True Believer! Let's ask the pulse-poundin' publisher:

SPIDER-MAN: HOUSE OF M #2 (of 5)
Written by MARK WAID & TOM PEYER
Pencils and cover by SALVADOR LARROCA

Peter Parker may be the world-famous SPIDER-MAN, hottest celebrity of the moment, but a disgruntled employee named J. Jonah Jameson has just been handed a loaded gun… one that could destroy everything Peter holds dear. Is Peter about to pay the ultimate price for humiliating Jonah one too many times?

32 PGS./T+ SUGGESTED FOR TEENS AND UP $2.99

Yep! Looks good!

Links Of Fury

Well, I Never! The Hot Parts Guy got so offended he walked out on Wedding Crashers after 16 minutes!

Drink My Blood: Pictures of Bela Lugosi as Jesus, from a 1909 Passion Play! [Via Boing Boing]

Cuban Poster: Guerilla Christ!

Jerry Lewis News!

Bat-Hound has a website (and, apparently, quite a thing for Batgirl)!

Can You Roll With Greg? Greg Burgas draws inspiration from the immortal Could You Roll With Lindsay?

Christ, That Dog's Big!

ITEM! How can I be happy unless I know every thought in your head? With help from a reluctant El Duque, I've amped my polls up to the maximum intrusiveness allowed by law! Go to the sidebar and punch the names you hate the most, then come back next week when your winners face fresh challengers!

Who's Worse? is brought to you by: A.H.O.Y

And by: Our Alternate Sponsor! [Scroll down for customer reviews. Via The Sneeze.]

More grossness. [Via Raymi]

Correction

The public editor column on July 3 incorrectly described an Andres Serrano photograph of a crucifix submerged in urine. There was no blood mixed with the urine, and the photograph was taken in 1987, not 1989.

The New York Times

Hammered

Thor Rolls A Joint [Via Metafilter]

You Decide, We Report

You believe that Rumsfeld is nearly three times worse than Tom Cruise and Ra's Al Ghul combined, and so do I. Thanks for voting. New poll soon.

Lede

Nine-year-old Joshua Harding didn't plan to miss classes Tuesday at West Monroe Elementary School. Nobody did.

But dismissed were his classes—for good.

Anecdotal Leads For News Stories Reporting The End Of The World by Hart Seely, at McSweeney's.

News From My Hometown

EAST SYRACUSE, N.Y. -- A 51-year-old man was arrested Wednesday for using his cell phone to take pictures up women's skirts at a Wal-Mart store.

Man, 51, Charged With Up-Skirt Shots
The Washington Post

SYRACUSE, N.Y. -- A landlord was charged with holding a family of three at gunpoint for 10 hours after accusing a 7-year-old boy of stealing $300 from him.

Landlord holds family hostage at gunpoint
Newsday

Tom Cruise reportedly wants to wed Katie Holmes in a small town near his birthplace in Syracuse, upstate New York.

The 43-year-old star is apparently keen to tie the knot with his 26-year-old fiancee in the gardens of the Mirabeau Spa in the town of Skaneateles, reports the New York Daily News.

The spa is part of a 10,000-square-foot mansion which stands on 12 acres and offers guests a heated foot-massage suite, herbal-infused steam rooms, fireplace-heated saunas, couples massage rooms, European hydrotherapy pools and soaking tubs.

A spokesperson for Cruise said: "To my knowlege this information is not true."

Tom and Katie to wed in Syracuse?
Ananova

Lede

HOLLYWOOD — Early morning breaks over the city of celluloid dreams. Superman fumbles for a cigarette. Flick. A long pull. Exhale.

Superheroes hit the street
USA Today
[Thanks to Agent Double-4]

Little Miss Hell

A beautiful baby contest turns frightening at angelswithattitude.faithweb.com. [Via Splog]

Two lithos Alex Ross is selling at San Diego Comic-Con. Click pix to see them big. [Via The Groovy Age of Horror]

Lede

Batman and Spider-Man lead the chant: "Jes-us, Jes-us, Jes-us."

Kids are on song with Jesus Christ, Superheroes
Sydney Morning Herald

Batman's Right Wing

Washington Post, July 3:

Holy smaller government and lower taxes, Batman... "Batman Begins" has become something of a cult hit among fans of free markets, individualism and Ayn Rand, among other things... Kapow!

The Bidinotto Blog:

This Batman is the antithesis of your entire sick, parasitical, eat-the-rich, blame-the-victim-not-the-criminal, sacrifice-the-individual-to-the-collective gang view of human nature and society. In the form of a mythic pop hero, Batman Begins presents a heroic, self-assertive and unapologetic view of human potential, individual self-responsibility and larger-than-life entrepreneurship. Batman is a fantasy archetype of heroic American individualism.

Objectivism Online:

Two other less prominent, but equally positive, ideas ran through the movie. One was the necessity of judging another's character primarily by their actions... The second idea, the one that was most shocking to me, was the idea of taking pride in selfishness. The hero of the movie actually conveys pride in selfishness.

National Review Online:

The generation gap between the Wayne parents and son, Bruce, marks a transition from detached liberal philanthropy to engaged conservative crime fighting. Bruce’s generous parents live at a safe distance from the city in a protected mansion. Bruce converts to conservatism the old-fashioned way — a liberal mugged, not so much by reality, as by, well, a mugger who kills his parents.

Acton Institute For The Study Of Religion & Liberty:

Yet one of the most gratifying aspects of this film is its affirmation of the value of traditional institutions more generally, such as the family, rule of law, and private ownership of the means of production.

The Ludwig Von Mises Institute isn't buying:

Wayne Industries is presumably the largest employer in Gotham, but never once is the firm's success or failure mentioned as a determinant of economic stability. Bankrupting the company by pouring money into a monorail is hardly the best way to benefit those in need of jobs and security...

The solutions Batman Begins offers to Gotham's struggle with economics and ethics are thus 1) redistribution of wealth and 2) a violent "crackdown" on those engaging in trade deemed unacceptable. Is this a message that should excite those passionate about free markets?

Breaking News

The Hot Parts Guy finally finished his goddam Fantastic Four review! Recommended if you like "human aflame repeatedly," "short nightwear in public," and "vulgar mannerism to clearly imply a man holding himself through a ski coat!"

BATCAKE

Erotic Batman watercolors by Mark Chamberlain. Not safe for: work, children, fundamentalism, trademark, social control, denial, or lunch! I know a lot of sites have beaten me to the link, but I can't resist stuff like this!

Links Of Fury

New UK Memo: Secret US/UK Plan To Withdraw From Iraq!

A Quiz I Flunked: Could You Roll With Lindsay? [Via Thighs Wide Shut]


Swarming Manly Tinkerbells: We must never forget the courage, strength and loyalty of the Supermen Emergency Squad! Here they are on three sensational covers!

Find your all-time favorite machine at the Internet Pinball Database!

A terrible title for a children's CD [Via Metafilter]

Christ, That Dog's Big!

GOD'S GUIDE TO THE HUMAN TORCH'S HOT PARTS

I.G.O.R., the SUPERFRANKENSTEIN computer, is still in the God damned shop! Normal service will resume upon its return (maybe Monday)! This makes me feel about as useless as The Hot Parts Guy, who left Fantastic Four in the middle

due to an urgency at home that would not have called me out of the theater if the CAP Ministry were a fulltime salaried ministry.

Hint, hint! Anyway, 56 minutes of The World's Greatest Motion Picture were enough to make HPG feel funny down there, with its

massive action violence; sexual requests, offers; below navel skin - male; other sexually immoral matters including Invisible Woman stripping to her underwear (she was invisible but her underwear were not and neither were the motions of a woman stripping invisible.) and a most vulgar implication regarding stimulated male anatomy.

He means The Human Torch cracked a superfunny joke about Mr. Fantastic's power to stretch his weenie! You can read the whole half-review at God's Guide To The Hot Parts!

Flickr: The London Bomb Blasts Photo Pool

London Bloggers and The UKBlogs Aggregator. [Via]

Wikipedia: 7 July 2005 London bombings [Via]

Photo: /Alfie's Moblog

A Time For Clobberin'

I.G.O.R.'s still in the shop. I'm borrowing SUPERFRANKENSTEIN's Girlfriend's computer to gloat that I saw Fantastic Four already!

No Spoilers: Stop worrying! While it's no Spider-Man 2, it's no Superman IV, either! After an hour of origin slop that belongs on a cheap cable network, it settles into a pretty good imitation of an FF comic book! And it breaks a record for the most product-placement crammed into a single shot! I can't wait until the DVD comes out, so I can pause it and count the logos! All in all, I give it two and a half cosmic-ray altered misfits!