Thursday, July 14, 2005

News From My Hometown

wstm

EAST SYRACUSE, N.Y. -- A 51-year-old man was arrested Wednesday for using his cell phone to take pictures up women's skirts at a Wal-Mart store.
Man, 51, Charged With Up-Skirt Shots
The Washington Post

wstm
SYRACUSE, N.Y. -- A landlord was charged with holding a family of three at gunpoint for 10 hours after accusing a 7-year-old boy of stealing $300 from him.
Landlord holds family hostage at gunpoint
Newsday

wstm
Tom Cruise reportedly wants to wed Katie Holmes in a small town near his birthplace in Syracuse, upstate New York.

The 43-year-old star is apparently keen to tie the knot with his 26-year-old fiancee in the gardens of the Mirabeau Spa in the town of Skaneateles, reports the New York Daily News.

The spa is part of a 10,000-square-foot mansion which stands on 12 acres and offers guests a heated foot-massage suite, herbal-infused steam rooms, fireplace-heated saunas, couples massage rooms, European hydrotherapy pools and soaking tubs.

A spokesperson for Cruise said: "To my knowlege this information is not true."
Tom and Katie to wed in Syracuse?
Ananova

9 comments:

Jacob "H" Tucker said...

I heard that Scarlet Johansen, Jessica Alba, and Lindsay Lohan were actually interviewed as potential girlfriends. I think it's because he needs a healthy uterus so he can father the Chosen One.

El Duque said...

Superfrankenstein,

I've heard the reception will be held at Doug's Fish Fry, home of the $6.95 Clam Basket. After filling themselves with bulk feed and cole slaw, the jubilant couple and their photogenic friends will head for Morris Bar & Grille, where they will dance the night away to the music of a special Open Mike Night, hosted by DJ-author-anchor-former NFL lugnut Tim Green.

Superfrankenstein said...

Duque,

Best Man: Baron Daemon.

Rob said...

Really makes you wish you were back home, don't it?

Anonymous said...

EAST SYRACUSE, N.Y. -- A 51-year-old man was arrested Wednesday for using his cell phone to take pictures up women's skirts at a Wal-Mart store.

To be fair, what else is there to
do in Syracuse?!

Jerry Willis

Superfrankenstein said...

Jerry Willis: To be fair, what else is there to do in Syracuse?!

Joe Friday: What most people do.

Jerry Willis What's that?

Joe Friday: OBEY the LAW.

Anonymous said...

Cross at the green, not in between.

Jerry Willis

Superfrankenstein said...

Elliott sent me an e-mail:

'I just heard the news on WFBL talk radio a report about a guy... who was arrested for using his cell phone to take "up skirt" photos of women at WalMart.

It went like this: "It turns out he was doing this at other places besides WalMart. The police discovered hundreds of photos on his phone, and they are currently enlarging them and going over the photos in an effort to identify some of his victims."'

Best cops ever!

Anonymous said...

Jerry Willis: You must obey the law in Syracuse.
Joe Friday: Right! Let's go over these
photos.
Jerry Willis: You've been looking over those photos for 2 days now.
Joe Friday: Well, what else is there to
do in Syracuse?

Jerry Willis