Thursday, January 06, 2005

Time Enough At Last

Burgess Meredith as Henry Bemis clutching books in 'Time Enough at Last'God's Guide To The Hot Parts--the provocative Christian movie review ministry that explicitly catalogs the dirty stuff--is on strike until the faithful come across with some jack, some scratch, some lettuce, some cabbage, some dough. "No new releases playing locally. Inadequate funds to send me to neighboring towns," so no spicy reviews for at least two weeks, warns The Hot Parts Guy (of course, he's lied to us before). But he does hip us to this amazing I guess literary ministry; ladies and gentlemen, it is my singular honor to present to you...

GOD'S LIST OF THE UNDERLINED PARTS!
It is a website. It is a calling. It posts the smutty passages and the smutty passages only, so you don't have to waste time reading entire books. Here's a sweaty fragment from I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings, by pornographer Maya Angelou:
“..white men wore shorts.. that.. had an opening for taking out their ‘things’ and peeing..”
Go. Celebrate the written word. Thanks to these good missionaries, you have no more excuses... and time enough at last.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I would love to see him tackle a Hunter S. Thompson book.