God's Guide To The Hot Parts

Why go to a movie without first consulting the ChildCare Action Project (CAP): Christian Analysis of American Culture Ministry? It obsessively lists a film's sins--a.k.a. the good parts--and divides them into six hilarious categories:

Wanton Violence/Crime;
Impunity/Hate;
Sex/Homosexuality;
Drugs/Alcohol;
Offense to God;
Murder/Suicide.

In other words, SHAZAM.

Here's how The Incredibles did in three of the categories:

Sexual Immorality (S)

smacking on the bottom, twice

rude gaze at posterior

dressing to maximize the [cartoon] female form and/or skin exposure
Drugs/Alcohol (D)

champagne to celebrate evil deeds
Offense to God (O)

four uses of God's name in vain but without the four letter expletive

transofrmation [sic] to a demon/devil using a baby

For steamier reading, click over to Bridget Jones: The Edge Of Reason. And don't miss the 900-film archive, particularly their classic review of the South Park movie. But don't look for everything:

Following are films we will NOT analyze due to content, rating or other reasons:
Meet the [Husband's family name from Meet the Parents] (PG-13). The implied vulgarity of the title is enough to eject this film from our project.

Unfortunately, as much as they make us laugh and think of nasty things, these clowns are not entirely harmless.